I'm doing it again. Reading through parenting forum posts and comments - feeling understood, validated, and even optimistic about my future as a mom. Escaping into an episode of the Netflix show “Virgin River” while my one-year-old son is napping is my coping method of choice today. When Paige told Preacher, “I didn't realize this was gonna be so hard. Not that I thought it was gonna be easy,” I FELT THAT. Parenting is HARD, and in more ways than you can fathom it will be before you start experiencing it for yourself. This is coming from someone who probably spent a total of one hour over the course of my whole 35 years on this earth with anyone under the age of 4. Ok, maybe that's a slight exaggeration – I babysat regularly for a few families during my high school (and early college?) years, but most of the kids were more in the 6-8ish age range.

 

I've never really been a “kid” person, but the jobs were easy to get, and I loved the families and was happy to help them. An original free spirit, I've always treasured my freedom and independence and had a passion for the arts. At 22 I was diagnosed with ADHD, anxiety, and depression, which gave me a newfound sense of peace and control over my life. Although I still struggle to manage my time and regulate my emotions (and fight the demon that is hyperfocus – sometimes it benefits me, but it has wrecked havoc on my life many more times than it has been beneficial), it has helped me immensely to be able to put into words the chaos that lives inside my mind and categorize it and decide how I would like to treat it instead of just feeling and thinking all of these things.

 

Becoming a parent has magnified my poor time management skills and made a joke out of my naturally decreased motivation to do even the simplest tasks (but my indecision is improving! Haha I can now literally throw on jeans and a t-shirt to leave the house without bothering to even brush, my hair, let alone put on makeup and pick out the perfect jewelry to go with a cute outfit ;-D). Having a baby and having ADHD has felt like a cruel joke in some ways, even though I wanted to be a mom and was very prepared for parenthood in certain ways. I love my son so much, and I'm incredibly grateful to be starting my mom journey when I am – old enough to have tons of wild adventures under my belt yet still young enough to feel able and willing to care for the human version of a Tasmanian devil.

 

I'm finally getting back into my passions for creation (besides creating a human, of course :-D) – I'm taking pictures, making music, and designing my own clothing, and I'm so excited to share all of this with you! I started working on my clothing line years ago, but due to multiple factors (the pandemic, getting hit by a car, having a baby, moving) it kept getting delayed (ok, also due to my own tendency to procrastinate and mismanage my time and resources – I own that, and there is power in owning up to your mistakes/flaws/weaknesses and trying to overcome them). Follow/friend me on my social media accounts to keep up with my journey and hear more about the adventures (and misadventures) I've had in my lifetime and what I have learned. Talk to you soon!